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Time to discuss the wealthy life of our youth !! Living in this luxurious small piece of the country, it’s only logical that even our children’s lives are affected by our acquired richdom. From baby Ugg’s to Dolce Gabbana play outfits for garden parties. Why buy cheap if you can buy brands, and what better way to show how much money you actually have than by spending it on useful/less outfits for ever careful and grateful kids. Always keeping in mind that we’re actually helping others, for the invested outfits will be donated as ‘nearly-new’ or  ‘worn-only-once’ to the poor, because when you have so much to choose from, nothing gets worn (out) !! I’m sure the children of third world countries have much use for these juicy, well marketed  brands, if only to alphabetize themselves !

I contemplated slowly introducing you to the world of children’s parties, but there is just no way of keeping it subtle. They range from full blown outings to Disney Land in Paris with a handful of  brats darlings; to a cosy home ‘happening’ with their favorite artist on stage. Children adapt so easily don’t they, it’s so cute to hear them say that they’ve seen it all a thousand times before. How rich and valuable their lives have been so far, who else can boast about this at their age and how lucky they are.

We fulfill their every need, hoping that for a little while they will be satistfied, but each time it turns out a new rage finds it’s way into the schools and shops. Of course all the other parents have caved in and  supplied their kids with the new goodies, so we cannot be left behind. The toy shops we no longer dare to enter for fear of knowing  that we will not reach the exit without a handful of expensive items that will be old news tomorrow. Our children pleading to us that this time will be the last time they beg us for anything. Of course we believe them, and to stop their pain, we provide them with just that little bit more.

To make sure they not only receive material love, we accommodate them with plenty of sports and extra curricular activities, preferably driven by a nanny or carpool-mom-team. Never forgetting that we need to take our own ‘zen’ time-out, for qualitative family time, later…

There is one thing that remains, unfeigned, and that is our love for them, for no matter how spoiled our children become, they are a product of ourselves and we will always love them. I can’t help but wonder though, whether we are producing loveable human beings, or abominable ‘aliens’, who may never again settle into what life on this earth should be about to begin with. I guess in 20 years I will be able to provide us all with a more accurate answer, although something tells me, we may not want to know this outcome.

For now let’s party on and keep the indulgence level as high as possible, we wouldn’t want the next door neighbour to think we care less about our kids than they do about theirs, would we ?! 😉

Upon reading an email I received the other day, it occured to me that in writing, we sometimes leave a sentence ‘unfinished’ and use  ‘…’   (three dots)  to ‘end’ it. It got me thinking about how much is actually ‘unwritten’ in those few dots, and it dawned on me that it’s often so much more than in all the actual words it was preceded by.

The dots are put in place for us to pause and think about their meaning. Mainly so that we fill in the blanks with assumptions, careful that we don’t completely miss the point that was supposed to be made by them. It’s a kind of ‘no man’s land’ where words and meanings can get lost or found. Where we sometimes like to place the unknown or unspoken. That which ought not to be said out loud, only ponderd. It is what we sometimes want and wish for but do not dare to openly expect. It is what we say, when we have no words left to say it.

The silence of the dots is not silent at all, if you think about it. Even though we see no words, a multitude of them may fill that dotted line, expressing so much more than the actual words ever could. It is an entire ‘world’ of thoughts and wishes that opens up with only one key  …  three dots and the magical world opens.

Which brings me back to the email itself. It was one written by a lovely person, who lives in his safe and predictable comfort zone, someone who rarely steps outside his personal borders, but who is now about to embark on the biggest adventure possible for him. A foreign country, far away from friends and family. A leap into the unknown, across the point of no return, and even though a return ticket has already been booked, the outcome of his journey remains unknown for now. Time will tell, I suppose, in his case, as this time his clock is ticking and there is no way back to the comfort zone that there once was. Everything must change. Seasons come and seasons go, but never quite the same.
The message I received was left open ended by 3 famous dots, the ones that hold the key to the unexpected outcome of what his travels may bring about.

It is when we step outside the lines, of what we’re used to, that we see new things, and experience the novelty of unchartered territories. Just like the sentence with a dotted open ending, we too must sometimes dare to leave some blanks if only to enable us to see or feel the new frontiers. Once in a while though step on to a dot and use it as the stepping stone it’s meant to represent, taking us far and beyond that which we may be able to express only in words.

It is there, in the silence of no words that so much is said.
Life may just be all about our travels on that dotted line …..

To be honest I think it sounds very uncool to ‘love yourself’, it’s one of those terms I feel only meditative spiritual people use, and frankly, I don’t think of myself as a spiritual person so much, even though my  life seems to have become a stream of filosofical ideas put into words every once in a while. But, having come to the conclusion that that (loving yourself that is) is what must be done, it leaves me no choice but to try and find a way to do so, within my self defined spiritual being.

In times of (great) need, people turn to anything or anyone they can to find strength, courage and especially hope. It may be sought after in weekly yoga or pilates, in hobbies and work, or, as in many cases in a form of  religion. For God seems to be the person we turn to in times of trouble. I am seldom a truly religious person, and shamefully admit that it has mostly only been in times of need. I believe there is a God out there however, but not at all the type of God we are told about in church or school. ‘God’ has always felt more like a good friend, a companion of (difficult) journeys, always, bestowing upon me a sense of safety. Accomodating me with an aura of ‘being around’, whenever, wherever, all I need to do is talk to Him, like I would to any other good and faithful friend. He has kindly been the one to love me through thick and thin….however awful I thought myself to be.

I have often referred to God as ‘The Man Upstairs’ because when I think of ‘Him’, I feel his presence overlooking me. We seem to have been through a lot ‘together’ and even though, I don’t always feel that I should summon him, because there are numerous others with more desperate needs. Still, I have never felt Him leave my side for even a single moment.

No, I am not trying to make anyone a believer who is not, or force a ‘religion’ onto anyone. All I want to say, is that in some strange way, I have never felt alone, it’s like someone has always been around, and in my worst moments, He has been my zone of comfort, hope and faith. Always there to talk to, cry to and laugh with. I have no idea what ‘kind’ of God, He may actually be, or which ‘religion’ He may be most asscociated with. All I know is that there has always been a sense of unconditional  friendship, emerging from this entity, and to me He’s been a kind of ‘backup-guy’,  best described by his unique and universal name ‘God’.

Challenging and difficult times cause people to search for this backup and support. Just knowing He is there helps you to start climbing your problem mountains, and that is when you once again start believing in yourself, and surely the act of  loving yourself should closely follow. It’s as magical as that. Right?!

In our ‘rich’ and ‘overindulgent’ society, we are saturated with what we think is all we want, jobs, attention, power and wealth, leaving no room whatsoever for a ‘God person’ to be a part of our lives. He becomes disposable, up until the moment that a crisis hits our lives.

It is not exceptional that inhabitants of Third World Countries suffering from poverty, natural disasters and all sorts of other problems, house whole ‘herds’ of people who go to church, and pray to God. These are people in continuous crisis situations, looking for answers, for comfort and maybe even for acceptance and help from others through Him. Desperately believing in His omnipotent power.

So to get back to my quest of self love, should we love ourselves with the same aptitude God has to love us, or is it ok to just let Him do all the caring, in return for our best behaviour as human beings?!

I catch myself being thankful to God, in my moments of great need, yet ‘forgetting’ to thank him, when all is ‘seemingly’ going right. A trait I do not specifically like about myself, for it is in times of no need that we should be most thankful and not the other way around, for God’s sake !!!